the strong wind

Do you know anybody who hasn't had a stormy life?

Over a sweet birthday lunch, we talked about this; those people who appear to live on smooth sailing waters, all of the time. And how difficult it can be to not compare. How difficult it can be to not wonder why God grants perfect traveling conditions to one, but not to another.

And yet we know.

Nobody sails through life without enduring a storm.

But still, even if we succeed at recognizing this hard truth, even if we succeed at keeping our eyes on our own paper, so to speak...how does this help us to endure? How do we keep our eyes above the waves?

One reason why I have not been writing, is because I have been reading and praying.

And after completing a Novena on Joy and Suffering according to Saint Therese of the Child of God, I have finally understood what finding peace in the storm means. Note, I say understood....not felt.

And there is too much wisdom here to share, so really, you ought to find yourself this small booklet and see for yourself. But the tiny piece of hope I found was in this: that everything that befalls me, every trial that comes my way, is permitted by God. And if I believe that God is a good Father, then what ever He permits is intended for my highest interests, my eternal welfare. But most of all, what I needed to know was this: God gives us the grace we need to carry our cross TODAY. And tomorrow, that same grace will be given. And so what does this mean? It means we must stop worrying about yesterday, and we must stop fearing tomorrow.

So much of what I have been fearing and despairing has been wrapped up in the hideous and all consuming, and mind you--completely useless- thought of "what does this moment mean for the days to come?" So much of my confusion and worry stems from my lack of faith; my disbelief that God is good, and that the grace he supplies me with today is all that I need. Rather than being still in the moment, I work myself up, fearing how I will be able to handle what may come tomorrow, forgetting that God is already there.

It reads in today's Gospel (John 6:16-21) that "the sea was stirred up because a strong wind was blowing." And it took my reading this a few times to see it.

BECAUSE.

The storm you are in may feel overwhelming and out of control, but take heart-

rather than focusing on the waves and the water, and for how long you will be in the eye of the storm, turn your head up into that strong wind; feel it on your face, and believe that God is there, stirring things up for your good, saying, "It is I. Do not be afraid."