come closer
I soaked myself in prayer yesterday.
From the moment I woke, until my head hit my pillow again, I took a firm grip on God.
This meant, of course, not doing what I thought I needed to do.
This meant, of course, leaving laundry for later and buying a crappy rotisserie chicken for a fast and easy dinner.
It is not easy to leave behind our own ideas of what will make for a successful and productive day, is it? And yet, we are all going to bed exhausted feeling like we didn't get it all done.
Why?
Sometimes it is necessary to do this.
To give yourself a day with God.
To walk dogs while praying the rosary.
To listen to Catholic podcasts while cleaning off the dining room table.
To play Christian Pandora while showering...twice...because the heat is just out of control and you smell. And by you, I mean me.
To read Scripture, to pick up a Bible study guide, to begin a new novena, to write a letter of spiritual encouragement, to read more scripture, to ponder all of the great things and works that God has done.
Because I think we all tend to marinate just a wee bit too long in negativity.
I think we are all so good at focusing on the bad, dwelling on the problems, zooming in on what is not right.
And my friends, there is so much to marvel at.
Even in the worst of times...sometimes, dare I say, especially in the worst of times.
There is so much good being done and at work.
But it requires us to slow down, unplug, tune out, and just be with God.
Sure, there are other ways to "just be"and if God is not your thing I am sure you can create your own list of ways to tune out. But tuning out does not wake up our hearts. Tuning out does not inspire, encourage, enliven, or renew. It numbs. And numbing always wears off.
Numbing is a cycle that never ends well. I do not want to tune out, I want to tune in, and I want to tune in to what matters.
Time with God, our Creator, the one who made you....it is invaluable.
Tuning in to Him is the only way to figure out who you are.
Because if you take an honest shot at trying to hear Him....
He will speak to you.
And maybe, what is confusing in your life will begin to make sense.
Maybe, what is heavy on your heart right now will feel a little bit lighter.
Maybe, what you are trying to numb yourself to, and completely forget, will take on new form.
When Joseph (you know, the guy with the colorful dream coat...Genesis...chapter 44...read it) , who was sold by his very own brothers, is face to face with them again....he is not bitter or angry or resentful. Rather, he sobs loudly. And after he sobs, and reveals himself to his brothers, he says this: "...do not be distressed and do not reproach yourselves for having sold me here. It was really for the sake of saving lives that God sent me here ahead of you."
And kudos to you, God, for always having awesome and perfect timing. (I hear that's your thing)
Because to read this the day after I intentionally focused on you and not myself, well...it is just too darn good.
Because what Joseph said to his brothers is what we can all say to our own situations, if only, we know you, Lord, and spend time with you.
There is not a thread in any of our stories that is there by accident or mistake. Every piece of our puzzle, every string in our tapestry....YOU PLACED THEM THERE. And why? "For the sake of saving lives." People...we may NEVER understand or know WHY anything happens. But it is not our job to KNOW. It is our job to TRUST. GOD knows how our story ends because HE is our author. And there are no throw away chapters in our book...they all matter and they are all there for a reason.
Sounds dramatic? Yeah, well, I am dramatic. But I am also so very sure this lovely summer morning that this is true. Totally and completely true.
You see, yesterday, when I cleared the junk of this world out of my head, these things popped up into my mind. These memories. These marvels. All these good things that have been born out of unpleasant life lessons, unspeakable tragedy, raw and bitter pain. Marvels, my friends! I do not use that word lightly! My God has called me to some pretty awful tasks, and to really awesome ones too, but good grief if I am honest, it feels like mostly crappy stuff...and yet...I am not distressed, because I am assured of His plan, and I totally trust that He knows what He is doing.
Like Joseph says to his brothers after they recognize who he is, God says to us, too:
"Come closer to me."
You see, God sends us all ahead of something.
But unless we come close, we may never understand why.
And when we do come close?
Well, that is when we will take our eyes off of our problems, and fix them on Him.
That is when we will marvel at all that the Lord has done.
Where has God sent you?
Come closer.
Find out.
