an easy battle plan for those who are having a crappy Advent, and why I need prayers for my anger to

(the modern day Mary and Martha?)

When my friend made a beautiful offer that I (barely) attempted to refuse, she defended her extreme generosity by saying "I want to do this. I have had the worst Advent. This will make me happy."

And I don't think this precious woman is alone. I think many of us, as the clock ticks and we see today's date on our phone light up like a time bomb, are thinking, "Crap. I really screwed this Advent up."

I woke up early and immediately began to battle with my own thoughts. My brain wanted to sit on the couch and plan out the day...wrapping, Christmas meal planning and shopping, last minute gift buying....but my heart desired differently. And you'd think it would be easy to listen to my heart. But the struggle is real. And even with the right desire, the battle rages on.

These last few days before Christmas are always the craziest and truly a force that goes against everything my heart and soul desire. Yours, too, I'll bet. And I have come to realize that I can not have it both ways. I am not a super woman, no matter how much I wish I were Wonder Woman, or at least looked like her. I know after so many years of trying to do it all that I can't do it all. I can't do the Christmas cards and the house cleaning and the shopping, AND find time for quality prayer, heart connections with friends and family, daily Mass. Add to all of that my daily job, four kids who have alternated needing a pick up from school due to illness, the house move, the manuscript that doesn't seem to write itself, and that stupid daily thing we call DINNER that much like the manuscript, requires me to make it happen. (good grief Lord, to what end? Why must we have dinner every night?) And so sadly, I choose wrong. I choose the stuff that I think needs to happen because God will understand. I choose the things the secular world exalts, rather than choosing time on my knees, exalting my Savior.

I knew my soul was in deep and dry distress when I spent nearly my entire yesterday wanting to take the life of the woman at Great Clips who should really find a job at Horrific Clips because she destroyed my son's hair. In fact, even as I write about it, I find I still have an unnecessary amount of rage inside of me and I am fantasizing about finding her and shaving her entire head while she sleeps. I mean honestly, she didn't listen at all to what my son asked for, or maybe she misunderstood him and thought by trim he meant scalp. See? I am so not over this. And this is not good. This is not a heart prepared for the birth of our King. And so with three days to go, I need to do something about it.

Because the thing is sweet friends, we still have time. We really do. And I always believe that half the battle is knowing we are in a battle, and that at the very least we have the desire to choose a better weapon to fight with; weapons that speak of truth and peace, that are strong enough to knock the secular demands of this season out of our heads, and cultivate the seeds of faith planted in our hearts.

I think I need a simple, realistic, yet effective battle plan to prepare for Christmas. And maybe you do too. So this is my plan:

BE PRESENT.

With all of the chaos, I have not been present. Not to my family and not to my God. I have been rushing in and out of my home and of Church. Today I will not brush off a child, or run off on a friend because I have "things to get to." Because every time I choose "to go and do" rather than "to stay and be with", I miss out an encounter planned by Christ. I will also re-introduce myself to my husband who has been equally, if not more, busy and preoccupied. I hope he recognizes me. I will wear a name tag, just in case.

GIVE THE PRESENT

Today I will bring the gift of my faith and the joy of Advent to others in whatever small ways that I can. A prayer for my family, a text of encouragement to a friend, a Christmas card with a personal message written by hand. Whatever small things I manage to do...a quick stop at the Church to kneel by the empty manger, a lit candle for a special prayer intention, a novena on my knees on the sidewalk in front of Great Clips, whatever it is...I will share it on Instagram...so if you are unable to do these things on your own, you can do them with me! It will be fun! Because sharing is fun! Unless you are a toddler. Then it's torture. (follow me at laura_m_phelps on IG)

OPEN THE PRESENT

There are so many small ways to open up and prepare your heart to receive Jesus. The best way? Read Scripture. (and by the way, this is our greatest weapon in this battle) No worries. I am not talking about a whole lot of reading, because I know, you have to get to the mall and your house is a mess and you forgot about the stocking stuffers. (which by the way, the stockings are the death of me. Can we get rid of the stockings, please? They are useless junk holders.) But how about today you read and reflect often on today's beautiful Gospel, Luke 1:46-56. You can do this. It is short. I have faith in you.

Feel free to join me in my battle plan to turn Advent around (if you need to) or to simply give it a final boost of "Rejoice! I say Rejoice!" if you have been an Advent rock star. And better yet, share your own battle plan in the comments. Because we need to do this, as Sisters in Christ. We need to encourage each other and help cultivate these seeds of faith; seeds that are so easily neglected when we are overwhelmed by the demands of this season, seeds of faith that are killed and destroyed when you encounter the weariness of this world, or the woman who chose hair stylist as her profession when clearly, it is not her spiritual gift. (deep breath, Laura)

We need to be Mary and Elizabeth to each other.

We have been given such a tremendous gift in Sisterhood. I am so grateful today for the Elizabeth friends I have that encourage my relationship with the Lord, as well as the Mary friends I have who teach me to say yes with all humility. (I need more of these Mary friends, by the way...not really doing so hot with the humility and yes thing lately) And I think, while good, quiet, alone soul time with the Lord is so needed right now....sometimes the only way we can get there is with the help of a good friend. Someone who runs to us in haste, shares the joy in her soul, and proclaims the good news. Someone we can share our heart with, without looking like a crazy person, who we know will stand with us in the battle, and fight along our side. Sisters in Christ are not women you want to mess with, you know. Strength and beauty, all the way.

Happy Advent, my dear Sisters! Prayers for you today in abundance guaranteed...as sure as the hair that is no longer on my son's head.