craven hearts and drooping hands and why you can still be brave and broken
Entry back into the real world after days on retreat is never easy. It became crystal clear to me that "every thought held captive to Christ" and keeping your eyes focused on Jesus at all times is just as essential, if not more, than the eighteen pots of coffee I guzzled down yesterday. Physical exhaustion, if we are not careful, makes us perfect prey; we are often weak and easily scattered when we are tired.
Resting in Scripture this morning a verse really spoke to me, and I sat with it for longer than anticipated. "Woe to craven hearts and drooping hands..." (Sirach 2:12) The image that came to my mind was of the women...nearly 300...that went on retreat with me; a ballroom filled with the Holy Spirit, courageous hearts and hands raised high. There was such power and joy and hope in that room, and I wondered why we do not worship like this all of the time; why we mumble our hymns and barely open our mouths on Sunday; why we do not raise our hands high.
Are we too broken to lift ourselves up?
The verses that come before this ( Sirach 2:1-4) tell us "when you come to serve the Lord, prepare yourself for trials. Be sincere of heart and steadfast, undisturbed in time of adversity...accept whatever befalls you, in crushing misfortune be patient..." and I don't know about you, but crushing misfortune sounds kind of harsh and might not be the best way to describe what could happen to you if you choose to serve the Lord. But...
let's be real. Serve or don't serve, misfortune happens and misfortune crushes. And I don't know about you, but I will gladly continue to serve my Lord even when, especially when, trials come my way. As Lisa Brenninkmeyer reminds us, "you can be brave and still be broken." And the only way that I know how to be brave in whatever befalls me is to fully rely on God.
I came home to a bit of a mess, but I have a choice. Droop my hands and drag my heart, or continue to sing His praises and stand strong, knowing that if I wait for his mercy, and trust in him, my reward will not be lost.
Truth is dear sisters, we are not too broken to be brave. Not if we choose wisely today. Let's saturate our minds with His truth, hold every thought captive to him, keep eyes looking up and press on in this battle. No matter the mess and no matter how broken, let us close our eyes and go back on retreat; standing shoulder to shoulder, courageous hearts beating, hands raised up high to our Lord who promises to help us, to give us good things. Let us fall not to the ground but into the hands of the Lord, "for equal to his majesty is the mercy that he shows." (Sirach 2:18)
