how to lead, not shove, your friend to Jesus

Leading people to Jesus is the best and worst job ever.

Being an Ambassador for Christ comes with both its perks and its costs, Amen?

But it is always worth it, and what we are called to do, and RIGHT NOW is looking like a pretty perfect time.

In yesterday's post I talked about those people in our lives who ask us to go to God for them, because they do not know how to go to Him themselves. Or maybe they feel too distant, unworthy, or uncomfortable. Whatever the case, this is our time; the moment to rise up and be bold in our faith. And it is not as difficult or as awkward as you might think. There's no going door to door...no handing out pamphlets on the street corner. You can do this.

So, you are out at the local park taking your dogs for a walk, and you run into that woman you know and like from your child's baseball team. You also know that her son is in the same religious education class as your son. You also know that she does not attend weekly Mass, and if she were to write down a list of her priorities, yoga, kids sports, family vacations and happy hour with the girls, would come before time with God. In fact, time with God is most likely not anywhere on her list. She is a funny, and smart woman that you enjoy talking to, and as you say goodbye, she throws this out there : " I know that God listens to you because you are so good...would you please pray for my family and our health? I am so sacred right now."

So, my dear little servants of Christ Jesus....here is your opportunity to lead her to God. And the word here to pay attention to is LEAD. We do not force people into the arms of God. That's like getting a hug from that weird Uncle you never met at the family reunion you did not want to go to. It is gross and creepy and you want out of the embrace, and then you spend the rest of the party hiding from him. Start slow, people. Save your talk on abortion, deliverance and exorcisms for a later date. And don't even assume that they have the familiar prayers, that we recite in our sleep, memorized! Baby steps, folks.

So what to do? Here are three of the simplest, easiest things you can respond with:

1. RECOGNIZE THE DESIRE.

Say something like this: "Recognizing the need for prayer is already a good prayer! Sure, I will pray for you, but my prayer is not any better than yours!"

Pointing out the fact that the DESIRE for prayer is already planted in her heart, is more encouraging than saying, "You should really pray yourself, you know." Truth is, recognition of prayer is the beginning of recognition of God. It is a beautiful thing. You can even THANK HER for sharing her desire with you. Truth is, for many of us who do pray, our prayer life can become very routine and mechanical. What a great reminder that our own prayer life began with that same simple desire..that search for something outside of ourselves!

2. ASK HOW?

Let her know that the only prayer that is not any good is the one we don't pray. Then point out that if she doesn't know where to begin, she should simply ask God, "Will you teach me how to pray?" This question is enough of a prayer.

People are immediately put at ease if you can relate your own life to theirs. Your circumstances might not be the same, but if you connect on an emotional level you will get a better response. Instead of saying, "I have prayed my entire life! I can't imagine NOT praying!", say something like this: "I am a cradle Catholic and I didn't start praying until I was 45 years old! I had no idea how! So I just started by asking God, can you show me how to pray? That simple question changed my life more than any self help book, therapy session or pilates class! Try it!"

3. START TALKING.

Chances are, your friend thinks prayer has to be something memorized, prayed in Latin, or meditated on beads (and yes, these are all great forms of prayer!) Share with your friend that prayer is nothing more than talking to God. That's it. A conversation. No fancy words. Doesn't have to be in a Church or on your knees. You can talk to God everywhere and anytime!

I have yet to have a phone call, text thread, or an in person conversation lately, that isn't about fear, worry, and a whole bunch of "what if's" and "how long's?" Covid 19 has people doing more than talking...they are literally dumping every bit of their anxiety and frustration whenever and where ever they can! This is a great opportunity to point out to your friend that prayer is exactly like the conversation you just had with her. Then, before you part your ways, you can throw in : "You know...I get it...if you are not used to talking to God you might feel stupid...but isn't that how all relationships start? Always awkward at first, right? But you can never get to know a person unless you spend time talking to them! It is the same with God!"

Then, go home and thank God for the good work He is doing. Thank Him for working through you.

Then wash your hands and pray for your friend.